Comphet (Compulsory Heterosexuality)

Noun (informal)

Pronunciation
KOM-phet

IPA (International Phonetic Alphabet)
/ˈkɒmˌhɛt/

Lexicographic Status
Culturally accepted term used in discussions of sexuality, identity, and modern dating culture.

Definition
Comphet, short for compulsory heterosexuality, refers to the social assumption or pressure that women are naturally attracted to men, regardless of their actual feelings or experiences.

The term is commonly used to describe situations in which individuals—particularly women—interpret or express attraction to men due to cultural expectations rather than genuine desire. It is often discussed in the context of self-discovery, especially among lesbian, sapphic, and queer women reflecting on past relationships.

Origin of the Term
The concept of compulsory heterosexuality was introduced by Adrienne Rich in her 1980 essay Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence.

Rich used the term to describe how heterosexuality is often treated as a default or enforced norm within society, shaping women’s understanding of relationships and desire.

Cultural Context
Comphet has gained wider visibility in contemporary digital discourse, particularly among younger generations exploring identity, sexuality, and relationship history.

In modern dating conversations, the term is often used to describe the experience of questioning past attraction to men or recognizing how social expectations shape relationship choices. It is frequently discussed alongside concepts such as heteronormativity and queer identity development.

While the term originated in feminist theory, it is now commonly used in everyday language to describe lived experiences rather than as a strictly academic concept.

Related Terms
WLW (Women Loving Women)
Sapphic
Late Bloomer
Heteronormativity

Sources
Wikipedia
Them
Adrienne Rich (Essay)

Related Terms in The Women’s Archive
U-Hauling
Sapphic
WLW (Women Loving Women)
Late Bloomer
Situational Queerness